Who is in Control – God or You?

I had my future figured out. I would retire from my job, once we had paid off my husband’s truck and the line of credit. In the meantime, I would get my blog all figured out and maybe this winter complete a few quilts. Once I retired we would visit our grandchildren more often. It seemed like I had everything figured out. The only problem was, it wasn’t my plan that controlled the future I had forgotten that God was in control.

Maintaining control

Maybe you make New Year’s Resolutions. Do you accomplish them, or by March are they a forgotten memory? I will write down goals throughout the year, but usually, they are in my head, filed away with numerous other bits of information. Sometimes, I reach the goals, but other times I change my mind, possibly dreaming up a better plan.

Can you make a list of five goals or plans that you have for the next year or two? Is retirement in your near future? Do you have a money savings goal you must reach? Are there a few more bills that you want to have paid off before you start working fewer hours, or maybe retire? Do you plan to move to a smaller home?

No matter how detailed we make our list of plans, in the end, how much control over them do we really have? I think we sometimes get so involved in our planning, that we forget that it’s only our plan. However, it will only happen, if it is in alignment with God’s plan for our lives. We don’t know the plans He has for us, especially, down to the last detail. All I know is His plan is better than mine and I need to trust Him.

It only took two days, for my plans to change

I went to lunch with my daughter, who was visiting from Virginia, on August 3 of this year. As we talked, I told her that I liked my part-time job, but I would hopefully be able to quit working when the bills were paid off. Achieving my plans within a year, seemed very likely.

On Monday, August 5, I lost my job, due to the restructuring of the company. Even though I fully understood the reasoning and if I had been the boss, I probably would have done the same thing, it was still surprising. But, I accepted it graciously, even though inside I kept telling myself I couldn’t believe I had lost my job and now I would have to start looking for another one. That was my last day of work. My plans had been altered in an instant and I was caught off guard.

I resigned myself to signing up for unemployment and starting the process of looking for a new job. After I updated my resume, I began my job search. My heart wasn’t really in it since this was the second time that I had thought I was working on my final job before retirement. I’m sixty-three and I know that each year I get older, it’s harder to find someone to hire me.

Hope before the next storm

By the end of the month, I had applied for a position that I felt I had a good chance to get. I went through the first interview and then the day before my second interview I had an MRI, due to unexplained hearing loss. The MRI had shown an abnormality. I found out the results of the second MRI, the following week. It showed a non-cancerous brain tumor. Never in my wildest dreams could I have seen this coming.

In a little over a month, my plans were totally changed and it wasn’t because of anything I did. I was surprised, but not worried. It wasn’t because having surgery to remove a medium size brain tumor was a simple setback. After all, we were talking neurosurgeons (yes, two of them) and time in the hospital and weeks in recovery. No, I wasn’t worried because I had finally reached the point in my life, where I let go of my plans and started trusting God for my future. This was way more than I could handle. I accepted that He was in charge and I could not change anything, except my outlook on things.

Have your plans abruptly changed, without any notice? I’m sure there may have been something that has happened to you or will happen to you. People face things like this all the time. It could be an employer goes out of business. You may lose a baby, that you were looking forward to adding to your family. A car accident can change your life, or that of a family member, in an instant. Or a forest fire can destroy your home of thirty years, in less than thirty minutes. Every one of these are unexpected. Every one of these would change your well-intentioned plans. Will you let an unexpected change devastate you?

God is in control

I’ve chosen to accept that God has always been in control. I can’t fix the current “problems” in my life. Seriously, a brain tumor? The odds were against that happening to me. But it has happened. And I am peacefully accepting this time in my life. Months ago, I had redone my Medical Power of Attorney and Living Will forms in case something happened to me. Coincidence? I don’t think so. God knew this was coming. I’m expecting that I won’t need them, but I’ll have them, just in case.

In the past, accepting that God was in control, wasn’t easy, even though He had control all along. I can honestly say, that every part of my life is under God’s control. I can feel God’s arms around me, keeping me safe. He has never let me down and He never will. The job loss was a small setback. The brain tumor put me over the top in what I would have been able to handle. Or so I thought. God wrapped His arms around me and made me fully aware that I was not alone. He is there beside me and I need to trust Him.

The right outlook

How do you react when the control you thought you had, becomes evident that it’s not yours to have? Even in small things, it’s important to realize that the control belongs to God. With Him, we have the ability to move forward in our lives. Accepting His control improves your outlook and helps you move on. Going forward with God can give you peace and a more positive day to day life. That doesn’t mean what you have gone through is trivial or that you need to accept it, put on a happy face and move on immediately. God allows us time to grieve the loss of our plans and adjust our plans to His.

I have found that the prayers of friends and family are so appreciated in times like these. Is there something that has caused you to wonder how you will survive? Let me know and I will happily pray for you. We are not only in this life together, but we should always be here, for each other.